#university

Empty Nest Syndrome

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Here is what Google has to say about Empty Nest Syndrome –  It can include depression, a sense of loss of purpose, feelings of rejection, or worry, stress, and anxiety over the child’s welfare. Parents who experience empty nest syndrome often question whether or not they have adequately prepared their child to live independently

I know this topic is not in line with the spirit of my blog..but hey it’s my blog and since I am about to experience this I wanted to write about it.

If you follow my blog at all, you know I have two children, one is in med school and has been out the home for 7 years now and my youngest son just turned 18 today. Not only has he turned 18, we are moving him to university tomorrow, insert deep breath here! You may feel sympathy for me right now, either you have been at this point in your life or you dread the day when your own children will go off on their own.

I am going to share a secret, shhhhhh, I am actually very excited about it!

lol I know I am not suppose to be happy about this but I am and truth be told I am tired. I am tired of making lunches, making sure their homework is done, are their favourite jeans clean, can they have a sleep over, can they drink, can their boy/girlfriend sleep over, can they have the car??…you get the picture.

Don’t get me wrong, I love my children, both of them are wonderful beyond talented human beings and have been very successful academically, played very high levels of sports and one of them plays and writes music. I am very close to both of them.

I started motherhood relatively early in life, having my daughter early in my 20’s and with a 7 year gap between my children I have been at this  for what feels like a long time. I am sure many of you are reading this in shock and disbelief, your children are number one in your life and you are devastated with them leaving but I am here to tell you from experience the next evolution in your relationship with your children is about to get better and actually a lot more fun!!

If you are struggling with this up coming enviable bitter sweet time in your life, here is what I have learned over the last 7 years since my daughter left home to go off to university.

  • No matter where they live in the world, they are still your children.
  • No matter how old they get, they are still your children.
  • It’s not over it’s just beginning. You now get to have a whole new relationship, one based on friendship.
  • They are nicer to you. Being out on their own gives them some appreciation for everything you did for them
  • You have more to talk about, instead of nagging at them about cleaning their room, they now have this new exciting life they want to share with you.
  • They actually want your advice . Hard to believe I know but now they call to ask you what you think, instead of telling to mind your own business.
  • You start to learn from them instead of the other way around. The world is changing so quickly and they are surrounded by new and exciting ideas that we tend to miss out on.

I must confess you will still miss them. As I think about my son leaving, no more high school Friday night football games to watch, no more loud music, not seeing his face everyday makes my heart hurt and even after 7 years I still have days where I miss my daughter terribly.

But even with this I am looking forward to this next chapter in my life, the new independence not only that my children have but I will now have. This is a time in my life where I get to explore new opportunities, new hobbies, more free time, like to write this blog.

And oh ya, don’t do anything crazy like go adopt not one cat but two, like I just did.

Honest this had nothing to do with my empty nest 🙂

cats

Have a great long weekend everyone!

Karen

Again thanks to all my followers and my new ones, we are making progress.

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